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You Have to be Fair in Love and Lust
By Mihar Dias
(C) Copyright January 2022.
In a landmark decision and one of the most progressive ever made, the Shah Alam Syariah High Court, on January 20th, ruled that a former cabinet minister would be allowed to marry a second provided he agreed to transfer ownership of a penthouse and a bungalow to his first wife.
Further, the first wife was granted ownership of a Proton X70 and be given an additional allowance on her credit card. The court also recorded the alimony the ex-minister would have to pay his future wife, in case of a divorce. The transfer of these assets to the first wife would be effected only upon settlement of all due hire purchase and instalment payments.
In a country where you often hear of women being unfairly treated by men who wanted to exercise their rights to marry more than one, this ruling was indeed a precedent to be cited by others in the future.
Hell hath no fury like a woman second(ed) is what this case is about. A wife in a Muslim marriage seldom had peace of mind because no first would like to be relegated to a secondary status in a three-way relationship. She, therefore, exercised her right to consent in this bargain. She was willing to let him pour his love on a second at her expense, on condition he too was willing to part away with what he loved most, to her.
I could almost read her mind “Since I have to share your love with another you must be willing to give away what you treasure most!”
Those two assets were perhaps his crown jewels amongst properties acquired during their marriage. They were also a form of security for her in case he was to default in his mandatory monthly support which had happened in past divorce cases.
I have witnessed first-hand, many poorly treated and neglected first wives going back and forth to Syariah authorities with children in tow, reporting their plight that unfortunately fell on deaf ears, most of the time.
Islam demands that a Muslim man treat all his wives fairly be it one, two, three or even four. But if they thought that they were unable to do so, by all means, marry only one. That was the very essence of a surah on women in the Holy Quran often cited by men to exercise their rights to marry more than one not knowing the spirit and the context within which the surah was communicated to the Prophet (pubh).
It was a difficult time for women when many were left widowed because of a period of wars that Muslims had to fight to exert their right to exist. So, men were allowed to marry more than one to help support the widows and their children, orphaned by wars, not just for love and lust.
In the case of this former cabinet minister who wanted to marry another, there was no war where he was called upon to help a grieving widow and support some deserving orphans.
I would like to believe that he really fell in love with another and was not hopefully driven purely by lust. Therefore, it was justified for him, to part with some of his assets to the first wife who might have lost some lustre when compared to another lovely lass that he lusted after.
My advice for other men who seek consent from their first to marry a second or a third or even a fourth be prepared to part with what you love most to lust for more.
The first wives now have a precedent to cite. I am with all ladies in the First Wives Club. To the husbands, you have to be fair in love and lust; “c’est la vie!”.
Mihar Dias is a content writer under Headliner by Newswav, a programme where content creators get to tell their unique stories through articles and at the same time monetize their content within the Newswav app.
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