At 37, he had been married for 10 years. He openly admitted that he had always been a “mama’s boy.” It was only after his mother played a part in destroying his marriage that he finally realized how hurt and helpless his wife had been all these years.
According to XUAN解忧树洞, his mother was a strong and successful woman who owned several domestic helper agencies. She had never really liked his wife. Before marriage, his wife had been a manager at a listed company in Brunei, earning around RM17,000 a month. After getting married, she gave up her career to stay home and raise their children.
He knew his mother often made things difficult for her, but he chose to look the other way.
The final breaking point came when his mother arranged a blind date for him. Although he was reluctant, he still went because he did not want to upset his mother. His wife eventually found out.
When she confronted him, she brought up years of painful memories that he had almost forgotten.
She remembered being made to wash the car and clean the floor under the hot sun while the domestic helpers sat nearby drinking milk tea and chatting. When she had complained about it before, his response had been that his mother probably did not know the helpers were free.
He now realized how cruel those words had sounded.
There was also a family trip to Japan that he had arranged, hoping his wife and his family would become closer. Instead, his wife called him crying because his mother and two sisters expected her to give them full body massages every day after their outings.
Even after he argued with his sisters, his mother privately asked his wife to apologize, blaming her for the tension between the siblings.
His wife endured all of this without making a scene. She had no family of her own nearby and had spent 10 years trying to keep the peace. During his hardest financial years, she had even used her own money to help him.
Yet when she finally asked for a divorce, she did not insult him or blame him. She simply said that she could no longer live this way.
He always believed he loved his wife deeply. He thought he was caught between his mother and his wife, but she saw things differently. To her, his actions had always shown that his mother came first.
He kept asking himself why he could not have both.
In the end, his constant obedience to his mother cost him his family.
When his mother learned about the divorce, her only comment was, “She has children now. No one will want her.”
For the first time, he had no idea whether he was more angry with his mother or with himself.
Jovy Jing (ndreagoh@gmail.com) is a content creator under the Newswav Creator programme, where you get to express yourself, be a citizen journalist, and at the same time monetize your content & reach millions of users on Newswav. Log in to creator.newswav.com and become a Newswav Creator now!
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