By Pola Singh
A tribute to three remarkable women who touched the Tara Singh family
When we think of angels, we often imagine celestial beings with wings who appear in moments of need, perform miracles and disappear. But as I grow older and look back on my own life, I have come to realise that some angels have neither wings nor halos. They are ordinary people who quietly enter our lives, lend a helping hand when it is most needed and sometimes change the direction of our lives without ever realising the lasting impact they have made.
The Tara Singh family of Air Leleh, Melaka, was fortunate to have three such angels. One was my eldest sister, Ajaib Kaur, who became a pillar of our family and a source of strength to many others. The other two were Veeraiswary Ponnusamy, whom we called Iswary, and Logeswary, or Loges, two young trainee teachers who rented a small room in our humble kampung home. What began as a simple boarding arrangement eventually helped lay an educational foundation that would change the course of our family.
My sister Ajaib Kaur knew hardship herself. As the eldest of ten siblings, she naturally assumed responsibility for the younger ones, especially after our parents passed away. Her own life had dealt her a cruel blow much earlier. At only 32, she lost her husband in a car accident and was left a widow with three young children to raise. She had more than enough worries of her own, yet somehow she always found room in her heart for the problems of others.
Living in Tampin, Negeri Sembilan, she became someone whom people, particularly women from the surrounding rubber estates, could approach for advice. Some were wives suffering abuse at the hands of husbands who drank heavily and demanded money for liquor. Many had little education, limited financial independence and were unsure of their rights or where they could seek help. Ajaib could not solve every problem, but she listened, counselled them and helped make them aware that they had rights and options. Above all, she treated them with compassion and dignity at a time when they desperately needed both.
Education was equally close to her heart. When she heard of children from poor families who might qualify for scholarships or financial assistance, she did not merely tell their parents about the opportunities. She obtained application forms and helped point them in the right direction. Despite her own limited means, she also set aside about 20 per cent of whatever money she received from her children and kind friends for Gurdwara Sahib Tampin, helping the gurdwara continue serving as a place of worship and community support.
In Sikhism, we call such selfless service sewa—service performed without expectation of recognition or reward. Ajaib never made a show of what she did. Even today, when I meet Sikh friends who knew her, some speak emotionally about “Lady Joe”, as they affectionately called her. Others remember her as the “Iron Lady of Tampin”—strong, active, friendly and kind. They tell me how much she helped them and how deeply she is missed. Only through these conversations have I come to appreciate how many lives my sister touched, often without even her own family knowing about it.
The other two angels came into our lives in a very different way. I grew up in Kampung Air Leleh in modest circumstances. My father was a cowherd and, with ten children in the family, money was always tight. Every ringgit mattered and my parents worked hard to provide for us.
To supplement the household income, my mother rented a small room in our home to two young trainee teachers, Iswary and Loges. Each paid RM50, which included meals and laundry. To us children, it was simply two young ladies coming to live in our house. To my mother, it provided some much-needed additional income. None of us could have imagined that their arrival would influence our family for decades.
Iswary and Loges tutored children from the kampung for very modest fees, and my siblings and I were allowed to join their classes free of charge. They helped us with our homework, encouraged us to speak English and gave us greater confidence in our studies. For kampung children with limited educational resources, having two trainee teachers living under the same roof was an opportunity we could never have afforded otherwise.
There was another consequence that we only fully appreciate in hindsight. With the additional household income, my mother could afford to buy the daily newspaper. Iswary and Loges were keen newspaper readers, and soon we children became curious too. In those days, reading materials in our home were scarce, so the newspaper became our window to the wider world. We read about events beyond our kampung, learnt new words, improved our English and broadened our general knowledge. Gradually, reading became a habit.
That habit has remained with us throughout our lives. It also encouraged some of us to write and express our thoughts. Today, when I enjoy penning articles and letters, I sometimes wonder whether part of that journey began with those newspapers lying around our Air Leleh home because two young trainee teachers enjoyed reading them.
The results came much later. I eventually graduated in Economics from the University of Malaya before pursuing an MBA and a doctorate in Marketing in the United States. My brother Jaib Singh and I became the first from our kampung to enter university. At the time, we never consciously linked these achievements to the arrival of Iswary and Loges. Only with the benefit of hindsight can we see that they provided an important early impetus. They planted seeds of curiosity, confidence and a belief that education could take a kampung child far beyond the circumstances into which he or she was born.
Today, Iswary and Loges are in their mid-80s. I want them to know, while they are still with us, that what they did all those decades ago has not been forgotten. My beloved sister Ajaib Kaur is no longer here to read these words, but her example of sewa continues to inspire me. In different ways, all three women enriched the Tara Singh family. One helped hold the family together and showed us what selfless service meant; the other two opened our young minds to education and reading. None sought recognition, yet all left lasting footprints.
Perhaps there is a lesson here for all of us. We may have angels around us today and not even realise it because we tend to associate goodness with grand gestures. Yet an angel may simply be a neighbour who regularly takes an elderly person to hospital appointments, a volunteer who serves free meals to the poor, or a teacher who gives extra attention to a struggling child. At Bukit Kiara, it could even be the anonymous hiker who, after a thunderstorm, quietly clears fallen branches from a trail so that others can walk safely. He finishes the job and moves on without waiting for applause, publicity or even a thank you.
Such people seldom advertise their good deeds. That is precisely why we need to become better at noticing them. Look beyond the obvious and observe the people who quietly make life easier, safer or more hopeful for someone else. And when you recognise one of these angels, acknowledgement need not come with a grand ceremony. A discreet word of appreciation, a telephone call, a handwritten note or simply saying, “I have never forgotten what you did for me,” may be all that is necessary.
As we grow older, perhaps we should occasionally look backwards as well as forwards and ask ourselves: Who were the quiet people who helped me along the way? We may be surprised by how many there were. Some may still be around us, unaware that a small act they performed many years ago changed another person's life.
The world may have far more angels than we realise. We simply have to learn to recognise them—and, while there is still time, quietly say thank you.
Pola Singh (mediaplayer1717@gmail.com) is a content creator under the Newswav Creator programme, where you get to express yourself, be a citizen journalist, and at the same time monetize your content & reach millions of users on Newswav. Log in to creator.newswav.com and become a Newswav Creator now!
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