What’s your day job?
I used to be a doctor, now I think of ways to make strangers laugh in a dark room for money. I’m like an untrained therapist, and the therapy is mostly for myself. So, in a nutshell, I am a stand-up comedian.
What’s your best investment?
Bitcoin in 2016. Also, marrying my wife in 2011 blablablablabla.
What’s your worst investment?
A Bitcoin scam in 2017. I am serious! I should have noticed the red flags but got too greedy. Luckily I wasn’t burnt for much. Recently, the founders were arrested in the US. It’s called Bitclub. Stay away from all these complicated schemes. You want cryptocurrency? Just buy cryptocurrency.
What was your first-ever investment (and how did that go)?
A unit trust called Public Islamic Dividend Fund. It’s still giving me returns, so I guess I’m happy. I bought it with money I brought home from Dublin. I worked in a pub there and managed to save some Euros.
Any investment no-nos?
I absolutely despise MLMs and pyramid schemes.
What are you investing for?
I am investing to be SUPER RICH and make my peers jealous. Anyone that tells you otherwise is lying. Also for my daughter’s future, retirement, blablablabla.
What’s your investment philosophy/approach?
I am not a very savvy guy so I invest mostly in stuff that I don’t have to watch all the time. I also save a lot of my income, live well below my means, perhaps too low because people keep complaining I dress like a homeless person. And from the saved income, I invest most of it. I don’t buy trinkets, gadgets or social status symbols to compensate for my small p***s. I spend money on making memories and acquiring skills. I also make friends with people who are smarter and richer than me, like Malek Ali.
What about insurance?
I do insure myself, especially medical insurance and travel insurance. But I’m slowly learning there are better alternatives than the well-known insurers. I would also like to insure myself against the common stupidity of general humanity. If such a product exists, I will purchase a plan in perpetuity.
What would you do differently finance-wise if we could turn back time?
If I could turn back time, there is no need for me to be financially savvy because…I CAN TURN BACK TIME HOLY COW HOW POWERFUL AM I? But to answer this easily, I would have bought even more Bitcoin and other cryptocurrencies, then as of writing this, I will quite literally be a trillionaire. I will be a time-controlling, trillionaire, otherwise known in many cultures as God.
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