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By Mihar Dias March 2025
By the time you reach your 70s, you’ve seen enough to know what really matters—and, more importantly, what doesn’t.
Take Uncle Aziz, 76, who used to obsess over how others saw him. “I spent years worrying about what my neighbours thought of my old car, my wrinkled shirts, even how often I watered my plants,” he once admitted. Then one day, his doctor gave him a wake-up call—his stress levels were affecting his heart. “Now?” he chuckled, “I wear what I like, drive my old car proudly, and if the neighbours think my lawn’s too dry, they’re welcome to water it themselves.”
Letting go of the need for approval is liberating. Most people aren’t thinking about us anyway—they’re too caught up in their own worries.
Then there’s Kak Mas, 74, a former accountant who prided herself on finding the best deals. She could haggle over 50 sen with the precision of a financial analyst. But after a friend fell ill unexpectedly, she had a change of heart. “I realised life’s too short to quibble over small savings,” she said. “Now, if paying a little extra means helping the fishmonger or the nasi lemak seller, I gladly do it. Generosity brings more joy than bargaining.”
At some point, peace becomes more valuable than being "right." Datuk. Abu, 79, used to love debating politics at the Mamak restaurant, determined to prove his point every time. These days, he just listens and nods. “Let people believe what they want,” he says. “If they’re happy thinking durians cure everything, let them be. I’d rather enjoy my coffee than argue.”
Friendships also shift with age. Just ask Ross who used to be the one always making plans, calling friends, chasing after reunions. But when he realised some people never made the effort in return, he let go. “If someone values me, they’ll show it. If not, I send them my best wishes and move on,” he shrugged. “Less drama, more peace.”
Even household habits change. Aunty Rohani, 77, finally gave up ironing. “Why should I spend time smoothing out clothes when life itself is full of wrinkles?” she laughed. And as for strict meal schedules, she says, “If I feel like eating cake before dinner, who’s stopping me?”
And emotions? No need to suppress them anymore. Syed Ahmad, 78, never used to cry—not at weddings, not at funerals. But now? A song, an old memory, a kind gesture, and his eyes well up. “Took me decades to realise tears aren’t weakness. They’re proof we’re alive.”
Most importantly, the elders all agree on one thing: ego keeps people from saying what matters most. “I used to hold back ‘I’m sorry’ and ‘I love you,’” Datuk Abu admitted. “Now, I say both whenever I feel it.”
So why wait until 70 to learn these lessons?
Start now. Let go of what weighs you down. Laugh when you want to. Eat what makes you happy. And don’t be afraid to say what’s in your heart. Life is too short to carry unnecessary baggage.
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