First of two parts
LAST Sunday, I was invited to speak at a parenting seminar at Lighthouse Christian Community in Las Piñas. During the Q&A, an interesting and very practical question was raised to me and another speaker: “How should we handle a child who is being bullied, and what should we tell and teach them?”
It is a question worth taking seriously because bullying is hardly confined to childhood or the schoolyard. Most of us have encountered a bully at some point in life, whether as a child or an adult. The bully may eventually take the form of a boss, a coworker, a neighbor, a social media acquaintance, a relative or even someone exercising influence in politics or religious circles.
A bully is essentially someone who unjustly uses power, force, intimidation or humiliation against another to impose his will or achieve his desired end. Bullying may be physical, but it can also inflict psychological, emotional and mental harm. Its objective is often the same: to diminish the victim until he becomes too afraid to resist.
But what does the Bible teach us to do about it?
Jesus famously said, “But whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also.” (Matthew 5:39)
Does this mean Christians should simply tolerate abuse? I do not believe so.
Turning the other cheek
The statement must be understood within Christ’s larger teaching in the Sermon on the Mount. Jesus was confronting the human instinct for personal vengeance. The preceding verse refers to “an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.” Christ was teaching His followers not to turn every personal offense into an opportunity for retaliation.
There is also an important cultural dimension. In the ancient world, striking someone on the cheek could be an act not merely of physical violence but of insult and humiliation. The reference to the right cheek has often been understood in light of a backhanded slap — an expression of contempt and social degradation. Whatever the precise mechanics intended, Christ’s point was radical: Do not allow an insult to turn you into the very person who insulted you.
Turning the other cheek therefore does not mean surrendering one’s dignity. It means refusing revenge.
Christ Himself demonstrated this distinction. When an officer struck Him during His interrogation, Jesus did not strike him back. But neither did He simply pretend that the injustice was acceptable:
“If I have spoken evil, bear witness of the evil; but if well, why do you strike Me?” (John 18:23)
Jesus confronted the wrong without becoming a wrongdoer Himself.
Created in the image of God
This is something our children need to understand.
A bully does not determine your worth.
Genesis teaches that every human being bears the “Imago Dei,” the image of God. After the Flood, God told Noah: “Whoever sheds man’s blood, by man his blood shall be shed; for in the image of God He made man.” (Genesis 9:6)
The sanctity of human life is grounded precisely upon this truth. An attack upon another human being matters because that person bears God’s image.
This also provides an important biblical foundation for restraining wrongful aggression. There is a moral difference between aggression and defense. Using proportionate means to stop an unjust attack upon oneself or another is not the same thing as revenge. The objective of legitimate defense is to stop the aggression, not to punish the aggressor out of hatred.
We should therefore teach our children neither to become bullies nor to believe that godliness requires them to remain helpless before one.
Teach them courage
The Bible repeatedly teaches courage.
When Israel trembled before Goliath, young David refused to allow the giant’s intimidation to determine what was possible. David’s confidence was not primarily in himself, but in God.
Scripture repeatedly tells God’s people: “Do not fear.”
Jesus Himself taught: “And do not fear those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. But rather fear Him who is able to destroy both soul and body in hell.” (Matthew 10:28)
Our children must learn that courage does not mean never experiencing fear. Courage means that fear does not become our master.
Teach them to walk away when walking away is wise. Teach them that there is no shame in avoiding an unnecessary fight. But also teach them not to be afraid to say, “Stop. What you are doing is wrong.”
Teach them to speak when another child is being mistreated.
Teach them to report bullying rather than suffer silently.
And teach them that asking legitimate authority for protection is not cowardice.
To be concluded on Aug. 20, 2026
