A recent Newswav poll claiming that 84% of Malaysian’s support bringing back caning in schools has once again unleashed the national pastime of pretending the problem begins in the classroom.
Immediately, thousands of people emerged from the shadows proudly declaring:
“Last time my teacher caned me, I became successful!”
Wonderful. But correlation is not causation, uncle. Plenty of people were caned and still cannot mute themselves on Zoom calls.
The issue is not whether caning works.
The issue is why schools are expected to repair damage that started years earlier at home.
Honestly, if caning must return, perhaps society has been targeting the wrong group entirely.
Forget caning the students.
Cane the parents.
Because somewhere along the way, parenting transformed from “raising children” into “managing tiny customers whose happiness ratings determine household survival.”
Teachers today are no longer educators. They are frontline crisis negotiators trapped between over-stimulated children and parents who believe accountability is emotional abuse.
Back in the old days, if a teacher called your parents, you experienced immediate spiritual separation from your body.
Today, if a teacher calls parents, the parents storm into school like lawyers preparing a class-action lawsuit.
“My child would NEVER behave this way.”
Madam, your son just filmed himself throwing a calculator at another student while yelling song lyrics from TikTok. There are witnesses, CCTV footage, and possibly drone coverage.
But somehow the teacher is still blamed.
Modern parenting has produced a dangerous philosophy:
If the child is upset, remove the consequence.
Child screams in supermarket? Buy chocolate.
Child throws tantrum in restaurant? Hand over iPad.
Child insults adults? “He’s expressing emotions.”
Child attacks another student? “The school environment failed him.”
At this rate, by 2035 toddlers will be filing HR complaints because bedtime violates workplace boundaries.
And you can already see the consequences everywhere.
Restaurants have become live-action daycare centres where exhausted diners pay $40 for pasta while listening to a child perform WWE wrestling moves using restaurant chairs.
Some parents sit there calmly sipping iced tea while their child screams like a smoke alarm possessed by demons.
The child is kicking tables.
Throwing forks.
Running between waiters carrying boiling soup.
Smashing cutlery together like they are auditioning for a tribal percussion concert.
Meanwhile the parents smile weakly and say:
“Aww, he’s very energetic.”
No, madam.
A Labrador is energetic.
Your child is recreating prison riot conditions inside a family restaurant.
And heaven forbid anyone complains.
The moment another customer looks annoyed, certain parents react like victims of oppression.
“He’s only a child!”
Yes. Exactly.
Which is why YOU are supposed to parent him.
Then there are the supermarket children.
You know the ones.
Running up and down aisles at Formula 1 speed while parents casually continue shopping as if nothing is happening.
Opening yoghurt containers.
Squeezing bread.
Rearranging shelves.
Eating grapes before payment.
Pressing every freezer door repeatedly like they are conducting scientific research.
One child is hanging from the shopping trolley like an action movie stuntman while the parent scrolls social media completely disconnected from reality.
By the time they leave, the supermarket looks like it survived a minor earthquake.
And not a single word of discipline is given.
Not even a weak “Don’t do that, darling.”
Nothing.
Then these same parents wonder why teachers struggle with classroom discipline later.
Because children who grow up believing public spaces are personal playgrounds eventually become teenagers who think society owes them tolerance regardless of behaviour.
Then comes the ultimate endurance challenge:
Flights.
Nothing tests civilisation more than being trapped inside a metal tube at 35,000 feet beside parents who have completely surrendered authority.
Everyone has experienced it.
The child screaming continuously for four hours.
Kicking the seat like they are training for the World Cup.
Climbing over strangers.
Watching cartoons at maximum volume without headphones.
Throwing crackers onto the floor like feeding pigeons in a park.
And the parents?
Completely passive.
Sometimes they even laugh.
“He’s in a playful mood today!”
Fantastic.
The rest of the cabin is in a psychological breakdown mood.
Again, nobody expects children to behave like silent monks.
Kids cry. Kids get restless. Kids have emotions.
But there is a difference between a struggling child and a parent who has completely abandoned responsibility.
Good parenting means correcting behaviour consistently — even when it is tiring, embarrassing, or inconvenient.
That is the part many people no longer want to do.
Because modern parenting increasingly treats discipline like cruelty and permissiveness like compassion.
The result is children growing up without boundaries, without accountability, and without respect for shared spaces.
Then society acts shocked when those same children become disruptive teenagers and eventually dysfunctional adults.
You do not suddenly become entitled at age sixteen.
That behaviour starts much earlier.
It starts when nobody tells you “no.”
When tantrums are rewarded.
When consequences disappear.
When parents fear upsetting their children more than raising them properly.
Teachers then inherit the problem.
Suddenly schools are expected to transform children with years of poor behavioural conditioning into respectful students using motivational posters and “positive reinforcement.”
Meanwhile teachers have less authority than a shopping mall security guard.
One disciplinary action and parents immediately appear demanding investigations, apologies, counselling sessions, and possibly intervention from Parliament.
Children are clever.
The moment they realise adults are afraid to enforce consequences, discipline collapses instantly.
And before anyone becomes dramatic — this is not advocating abuse or violence.
There is a massive difference between discipline and cruelty.
Discipline teaches responsibility.
Cruelty teaches fear.
Unfortunately society now treats any form of correction as oppression while simultaneously complaining that children have become uncontrollable.
You cannot have both.
A respectful society does not happen accidentally.
It is built at home first.
Children learn behaviour by watching parents:
How they speak to waiters.
How they handle anger.
How they treat cleaners.
How they respond when things go wrong.
A parent screaming at customer service staff while demanding their child “respect others” is basically conducting a hypocrisy workshop.
And maybe this is why the caning debate keeps resurfacing.
Because deep down, people sense discipline has disappeared somewhere.
But caning alone solves nothing if parents continue outsourcing responsibility to schools, restaurants, retail workers, and random strangers trapped beside them on airplanes.
The uncomfortable truth is this:
Good parenting is exhausting.
It requires consistency.
Boundaries.
Patience.
Saying “no.”
Following through.
Being disliked temporarily by your own child for their long-term benefit.
A cane is easy.
Raising decent human beings is hard.
So yes, perhaps discipline needs to return.
But if society truly wants accountability restored, maybe the first people lining up should not be schoolchildren.
It should be the parents who raised them to believe the world revolves around them.
The Daily Durian (zaynp100@yahoo.com) is a content creator under the Newswav Creator programme, where you get to express yourself, be a citizen journalist, and at the same time monetize your content & reach millions of users on Newswav. Log in to creator.newswav.com and become a Newswav Creator now!
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