Dear 15-year-old me,
It might be a different type of article compared to the ones I do, but I wanted to talk about my journey and where I am. Who knows, you might have an idea of who I am as a person.
Looking back at this picture, seeing myself 10 years apart feels like I have gone through a lot of things.
I might be 25 years old studying for my degree, but honestly, it took me a good 4 years to consider whether I wanted to continue my studies. It was 2015 when I left school. At the age of 16. I knew I wanted to be part of the media industry somehow or a filmmaker, but back then, I always thought that I needed the education to pursue all these creative jobs. I worked as a personal trainer, did some internships and worked on a film set.
They say school will be the best years of my life, but I beg to differ. Growing up, I was not the ‘book smart type.' In school, I was failing almost everything and surprisingly, I didn't skip any classes, which still to this day is a surprise to me and almost every week, I will always get feedback saying, ‘Lewis must try harder,' ‘he’s not paying attention in class' and a lot more comments.
It even led to teachers who were teaching me to think about whether I was serious about studying or not. Some people were thinking that I wasn't going to make it in life because I didn't take my education seriously. I thought what they said was serious, just imagine a 15-year-old person who has no idea what life was all about.
I know I scored low on some tests and don't pay attention to class, but ask yourself this: If you were interested in something, you would give it your best. Just because I scored low on a test does not define who I am as a person. I apologise that I don't meet your expectations, we are humans and we can't be good at everything.
In school, the only thing I enjoyed was the friends I made and the teachers who supported me through my journey. Those were the things I took away from school. The times I always played lunchtime football, competed in sports events and the memories I made with my friends were some things I enjoyed. In terms of subjects, I was never a big fan of science, maths, English or any subjects in school except for subjects such as PE or anything sport-related.
It's quite ironic that I didn't like English, and 10 years later, I'm here writing an article - but that's the beauty of life in a way.
When I left school, I told myself that I knew I did not want to pursue my studies. I see all my friends pursuing their diplomas, foundations, A-levels, etc. Whereas I, myself, decided that I just wanted to work and experience the world. With each job that I took, I made mistakes, I made a fool of myself and I was just a small kid in a big pond trying to make a name for himself.
I took the not-so-traditional of every kid: Go to school, go to university and get a job. I'm glad I took a different approach to it.
I left with only one credit to my name and failed all my other exams for my GCSEs. At the time, I thought it was the end of the world. No company was not going to accept me. I thought I was going to be a failure. School taught me that if I didn't get a good job, I wouldn't make it in life and would be a failure. Well, that's what I thought.
But with each experience that I took, with each job I took, it felt like this was what school didn't teach me at the time. I felt that academically gifted people will excel in terms of the theoretical side of life. The way I see it is, that if you want to study to become a doctor, lawyer, dentist, scientist, etc, that one requires years of study, I salute all of you who are doing those types of jobs, that require intense knowledge and discipline. But I feel like if you want to be part of the creative side, is a degree or diploma necessary?
Creativity can be through writing, drawing, filmmaking, music and many other more. Sure some people might do it for the piece of paper to ensure stability for their future or some people might just do it to add extra knowledge or do it for the sake of doing it.
When I was working, it was strange for my colleagues at the time to be working with a 16-year-old at the time, but they eventually accepted having me as a colleague. If I were to look back at the experiences I had, I would be thankful who those experiences in terms of shaping the way I am as a person today. Mistakes and all the things I have been through helped me.
One fine day, I was walking to work, just something always liked to do - it gave me time to think and reflect on life. Can't believe I was reflecting on life when I was 17 or 18 at the time, but I knew since I was out of education for two years at that time, it was just a random thought I had on my mind.
I certainly enjoyed my time working, but I felt like I wanted to prove some people wrong. I wanted to prove that I wasn't a person who was going to be a failure and I wanted to prove that the subjects that I took in school were not for me.
It was one of those moments which came upon me.
But the main reason why I wanted to study was to help complement the experience that I had. I knew that I wasn't going to get the highest grade. I knew that I wouldn't be the top in the class. I just had one purpose and it was to get that paper and gain some knowledge which would be relevant to me. I just wanted that paper and gain some knowledge which I perhaps can apply to the real world.
Teachers and lecturers tell you to aim high, but I just feel like I just need a pass. People question me for this, but at the end of the day, I'm the one who is studying and I have that end goal in mind.
Grades at the end of the day do not determine what you're going to be like in the future. At the end of the day, companies won't ask what I got for that test last time, they only care if I can do the work or not.
Surprisingly, thanks to the one credit I gained from school, I went back to study in 2019, to pursue a certificate, where I was back in college, it felt weird. I knew it was going to be tough. But what came to my surprise is how out of my 5 years of studying, I only failed 1 subject. I guess it's safe to say that the way school was taught for me was not for me. I had moments where I wanted to give up and moments where I almost failed, but most importantly, I knew that I just needed to pass.
I couldn't care less if I got an A for my subject. I just wanted to see the news I passed, I'm happy. I've only received 4 A's in the past 5 years. But I didn't care about it, it's just a bonus to know that my hard work paid off.
Thanks to studying, my passion for filmmaking a reality, it was all thanks to the people I met and all the projects we've done.
As we speak today, I've won a few awards in my filmmaking, worked as a photographer where I handled big companies, worked out to keep myself fit and had more big projects coming out and here I am doing my degree.
Check out some of the work which I have done!
I know I have not had that ‘big break’ yet, but we are all at different stages of life. Compared to 2015, I knew that I was at a better stage than where I was at.
I've accepted the fact that I'll never be that perfect student for teachers who always aim for high A's; however, I know that with the experience that I've gained, I consider myself to be street smart. I'm just pursuing my degree to help make my resume ‘complete.’
Best Regards,
Lewis Knight.
If you were to write a letter to yourself some time ago in life, what would you say to them? Stay tuned for my up-and-coming articles!
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