A relationship on its own already requires tons of effort from both sides. Now, imagine a long-distance relationship (LDR); everything is ten times more than usual!
No, I am not trying to scare you if you’re in one now, but those in LDR, you know what I mean. You hardly get to meet in person, everything is done virtually and it’s a tad bit worse when you’re both in completely different time zones.
Whether you’re new to LDR or an expert for years, these relationship dynamics will most definitely put a strain on both of you. It is an unfortunate and inevitable situation. It might even feel like it’s not worth the time, effort and love.
But, don’t give up yet! Take it from me, an ex-LDR expert; you can still improve your relationship with your partner, even in a long-distance relationship. Here are some simple ways on how to do so.
1. Communicate even more!
As mentioned above, everything is ten times more, so the communication between you and your partner has to be extra. Now, don’t be mistaken that it means a complete 24/7 report to your ‘boo’ about what you’re doing, where you’re at, what you ate, etc. That sounds more like parenting than a relationship.
What I meant was that when your emotions are in turmoil, or you are overwhelmed with work and assignments, or you are just not feeling good mentally, tell your partner. Imagine you keep all these emotions and stress bottled up, and one day you burst out. Not only is your partner hurt and confused but it will make you feel like a bad partner, too.
Explain to them about your current predicament, rant to them if you need to, and clarify that you are unable to text or call them at the moment. Trust me, it makes things easier to handle for you and your partner. Also, I’m 100% sure that your partner will completely understand and still love you.
2. Set a virtual date at least once a week…and honour it!
Since you both can’t meet frequently like non-LDR couples who go dating every day, this is a way to compensate for that. Your partner and you can discuss and set up a virtual date at least once a week so you both can have your personal time. This date can be a movie date, a dinner date, an ice cream date, or just a talking date!
As much as it’s a bummer that you need to get your own meals, popcorn, etc. and have them yourself, the time you spend with your partner is priceless. You can watch movies, talk about anything, dress up for dinner; and it all becomes better when you’re doing it with your special him or her.
The keyword to this tip is to honour the date. If either one of you flakes it once or twice for emergencies, that’s okay but when it becomes a habit, this will not work anymore. So, try your very best to keep the date, day, and time free to just be with your partner.
3. Make plans to meet up in person!
Nothing kept me as excited as when I am counting down the days to meet my significant other! I’ll admit it’s usually a quick interstate trip but still, we could only meet once a month and only for a day. So, he’ll usually leave home early, around 6 AM, and back on the road home around 6 PM. Once he’s home, we immediately plan the next meet-up and we go back to counting the days.
It should not always be LDR with calls and texts only. Always make plans to meet up with each other by taking turns travelling. If it’s a distance of interstate within Malaysia, I’m sure it is pretty convenient to do so. Just plan a few days of vacation, apply for your leaves, and get going!
However, if it’s the case of two countries, it might be slightly tricky due to the costs, travelling, and timing. It requires more savings, planning with each other, and more time duration but it is not impossible. After all, don’t we say we’ll cross the great seas for love, right?
4. Deliver surprises to them!
Usually, on special days like birthdays and anniversaries, we would expect deliveries from our partners, regardless of the location. Then again, what if you receive a small bouquet of flowers as a surprise on a Thursday morning and it’s a token of appreciation from your partner? It is guaranteed to make you smile all day, feeling loved and appreciated!
This is what delivering surprises does to your partners. Your surprise doesn’t have to be expensive; it doesn’t have to be done every week and only on special occasions. Knowing your partner’s favourite things; flowers, food, desserts, etc., just place an order and wait for them to call you crying from happiness. This is possible even if your partner is on the other side of the globe. The cost would be higher, yes, and it will take lots of research for an appropriate delivery company but hey, once every two months, is still good enough.
I know for a fact that a surprise lunch delivery to me on a random Tuesday is enough to make me smile and boost my mood for the rest of the day!
These are just some of the ways you can improve your relationship in LDR so just pick one and try it next month. Slowly, you will know what makes him/her happy and do that more often than the others.
LDR is hard but with the right person, it becomes less hard and full of love!
Vinothini is a content creator under the Newswav Creator programme, where you get to express yourself, be a citizen journalist, and at the same time monetize your content & reach millions of users on Newswav.
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