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Just when you think our politicians can’t possibly outdo themselves in the creativity department, PAS says: “Hold my sirap bandung.”
Apparently, the latest revolutionary idea to boost Malaysia Airlines’ reputation is not better routes, competitive ticket prices, or improved customer service - but to replace champagne with cendol. Because clearly, what the aviation world has been missing all this while is sticky gula Melaka dripping down passengers’ tray tables at 30,000 feet.
According to PAS MPs, we don’t need alcohol to attract tourists. Instead, our national airline should serve “traditional Malaysian drinks like sirap bandung, cendol, and ABC.” Now, I don’t know about you, but I’d pay good money to watch a flight attendant try to assemble an ais batu campur midair during turbulence.
Imagine the captain’s announcement: “Ladies and gentlemen, we are experiencing slight turbulence, please fasten your seatbelts - and if your ABC is now lodged in your neighbor’s lap, our cabin crew will assist shortly.”
I can’t help but wonder where these ideas come from. Is there a special committee in PAS dedicated to brainstorming ‘The Most Irrelevant National Concerns’? Do they gather around sipping warm air sirap bandung, asking, “What can we ban or replace today to make Malaysia great again?”
Because while they’re busy worrying about who’s drinking what on a plane, our education system is in crisis - but no - priorities. We must first save the soul of Malaysia Airlines by purifying its beverage cart.
And then, there’s the delicious contradiction: PAS Selangor openly says it may NOT ban alcohol if it ever wins the state. So, on the ground, it’s “drink responsibly, we need the votes,” but in the air, it’s “repent, the altitude is too high for sin.”
Maybe that’s the real turbulence Malaysia’s facing: politicians who confuse governance with a cendol session. If only smart ideas flowed as easily as gula melaka, we’d all be flying first class by now.
Fa Abdul (fa.abdul.penang@gmail.com) is a content creator under the Newswav Creator programme, where you get to express yourself, be a citizen journalist, and at the same time monetize your content & reach millions of users on Newswav. Log in to creator.newswav.com and become a Newswav Creator now!
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