SATIRE | The PM Buffet: Please Choose One From the Display

Opinion
13 Jun 2026 • 5:30 PM MYT
Mihar Dias
Mihar Dias

A behaviourist by training, a consultant and executive coach by profession

Image from: SATIRE | The PM Buffet: Please Choose One From the Display
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The PM Buffet: Please Choose One From the Display Cabinet

By Mihar Dias June 2026

Every few years Malaysians are invited to participate in a national ritual.

Political parties call it democracy.

Political consultants call it voter engagement.

The rakyat know it by another name: choosing which familiar face gets to explain why things are not their fault.

The recent exercise listing six potential prime ministers reads rather like a restaurant menu. https://newswav.com/A2606_o9tQCK?s=A_6P71iGM&language=en

Everything is presented attractively. Every dish comes with glowing descriptions. Every candidate possesses experience, vision, resilience, moderation, stability, leadership and the ability to unite the nation.

One begins to wonder whether Malaysia has a surplus of exceptional leaders and a shortage of exceptional results.

The article assures us it is neutral. Naturally. Every political profile in Malaysia is neutral in the same way that a mother describing her children is neutral.

Yet hidden among the diplomatic praise is an uncomfortable reality. Of the six names presented, only two emerge relatively free from the political baggage that has become the defining feature of modern Malaysian politics.

One comes from Terengganu.

The other comes from Sarawak.

The rest arrive carrying enough historical luggage to qualify for excess baggage charges at KLIA.

Take Datuk Seri Anwar Ibrahim.

His political journey resembles a Netflix series that has run for too many seasons. There has been betrayal, imprisonment, redemption, resurrection and finally the long-awaited arrival at Putrajaya.

No Malaysian politician has fought longer for the premiership.

The irony is that after spending decades convincing Malaysians he would change the system, he now spends much of his time explaining why the system cannot be changed quite so quickly.

His supporters ask for patience.

His critics ask what happened to Reformasi.

Both sides may have valid points.

Then there is Datuk Seri Hamzah Zainudin.

A competent administrator, undoubtedly. A serious operator. A man who looks as though he reads policy papers for leisure.

Yet politics is often less about capability and more about perception.

And perception, unfortunately, is a cruel master.

Tan Sri Muhyiddin Yassin remains respected by many Malaysians for steering the nation through Covid-19.

History may judge him kindly for that.

History may also remember that the political instability of recent years did not exactly happen in spite of politicians. It happened because of them.

Datuk Seri Ahmad Zahid Hamidi deserves recognition for one remarkable achievement.

Few politicians in modern Malaysia have demonstrated such survival instincts.

If political longevity were an Olympic event, he would return with multiple gold medals.

Coalitions collapse.

Governments fall.

Allies become enemies.

Enemies become allies.

Yet somehow Zahid remains standing when the dust settles.

The question, however, is whether survival alone qualifies someone to lead a nation.

Cockroaches are also excellent survivors.

Which leaves two candidates who appear refreshingly different.

Datuk Seri Dr Ahmad Samsuri Mokhtar has something increasingly rare in Malaysian politics: the image of a technocrat.

He speaks less.

He performs more.

He is not constantly embroiled in endless factional warfare.

Most importantly, he has yet to accumulate the national collection of controversies that seems almost mandatory for senior politicians.

His challenge is simple.

Can a man known for competence survive a political culture that often rewards theatrics?

Then there is Datuk Seri Fadillah Yusof.

If Malaysian politics were a noisy family dinner, Fadillah would be the relative quietly eating his meal while everyone else argues.

His rise reflects a reality that many in Peninsular Malaysia still struggle to accept.

Sabah and Sarawak are no longer passengers on the federal bus.

Increasingly, they are holding the steering wheel.

For decades East Malaysia was treated as a fixed deposit.

Today it resembles the bank manager.

The idea of a prime minister from Sarawak would once have been dismissed as fantasy.

Today it appears entirely plausible.

And perhaps that is what makes Fadillah interesting.

He represents neither political revolution nor ideological crusade.

He represents stability.

A word that sounds boring until one remembers how much instability has cost the country.

The deeper problem with the entire discussion, however, is the assumption that Malaysia's salvation depends on finding the perfect prime minister.

It does not.

Malaysia has spent decades searching for political messiahs.

Each arrives promising transformation.

Each departs leaving behind disappointed believers.

Perhaps the real lesson is that institutions matter more than personalities.

A weak system can destroy a good leader.

A strong system can survive a mediocre one.

If Malaysians are forced to choose from the current list, many may quietly find themselves drawn towards the two least tainted names.

One from Terengganu.

One from Sarawak.

Not necessarily because they are better.

Not necessarily because they possess superior visions.

But because in a political landscape crowded with veterans carrying decades of unfinished battles, scandals, rivalries and broken promises, there is something oddly attractive about candidates who have accumulated fewer political scars.

Of course, Malaysian politics has a habit of disappointing those seeking fresh starts.

By GE16, the menu may change completely.

New dishes may appear.

Old dishes may be reheated.

And Malaysians, as always, will be invited to choose.

The only certainty is that whatever choice is made, somebody will later explain that the result was not what was promised because circumstances changed, coalition partners interfered, global conditions deteriorated, previous governments left problems behind and the rakyat simply need a little more patience.

In Malaysia, patience remains our most abundant natural resource.

This version uses satire to make the point that Samsuri and Fadillah appear comparatively untainted, while questioning the tendency to treat every election as a search for a political saviour.

Author's Note: AI tools were used as a research, drafting and editing aid. The views, analysis and conclusions expressed are entirely those of the author.


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