Masturbation doesn't just feel good - it's also healthy, health experts overwhelmingly agree. For one thing, it releases sexual tension. And it helps you to understand your body better and what gives you sexual pleasure.
"It's very important to know yourself, and all the more so if you enter into more intimate, emotionally deeper contact with someone," says sex therapist Ann-Marlene Henning.
For centuries, masturbation has been stigmatized in many societies - wholly without justification, she says. "Today it's completely clear that it's extremely healthy for your body and boosts your immune system."
Orgasm itself, as science tells us, is simply a reflex, similar to the knee-jerk reflex. But between sexual arousal and climax lies a controllable interval that every one of us can affect.
"Anything that helps to make you feel good brings you closer to sexual climax," says Henning, adding that it's important to immediately sense when something seems off while you're pleasuring yourself.
The question is then why. Is your breathing shallow and are you tensed up? Are your movements too fast and forceful, for instance hurried rubbing or overstrained pressing? Or can you consciously slow down, relax your body, touch yourself more gently and breathe more deeply?
Body awareness and mindfulness are fundamentally important for sexual satisfaction. This is why focus and conscious perception can be more helpful than purely mechanical techniques.
In slow solo sex, orgasm isn't the goal. It's about how you're feeling, here and now. What's making you feel good? Are you relaxed? Achieving orgasm is deliberately de-emphasized.
Experiment with different ways of touching yourself: gentle stroking, firmer pressure, circular movements, patting, vibrations. Whatever arouses your body is good.
Include other parts of your body. Instead of concentrating on your genitals, explore your inner thighs, bottom, chest area, neck and earlobes. Many people discover erogenous zones they never knew they had.
Try masturbating both with and without sex aids: either hands only or with a lubricant, silk scarf or sex toy. Pay attention to the differing sensations from the various materials and textures.
How you breathe has an impact. Here's a simple trick: Just before you're about to come, stop stimulating yourself and take a deep breath. This relaxes your entire body. When you pick up where you left off, your arousal will be much stronger.
Masturbation is healthy self-exploration and enhances well-being. Conscious body awareness and relaxation result in more intense sexual experiences, whether solo or with a partner.
