Being a student in the early 2000s, we grew up a lot on television. I remember waking up, grabbing my breakfast, turning on the television and plopping my butt in front of it to watch Fiffy and the Flowertots because that was the kind of show they put on for the breakfast slots in the early mornings. Seven to eight hours later, I'd be back in the same position, this time instead with lunch alongside my grandfather and siblings. I would do my homework, and then at four p.m., I would get ready for the evening slots with my favourite shows like Hannah Montana or Icarly. It was always hard to choose because they came on at the same time so I would just switch to the other channel when they replayed an episode. At night, I knew exactly when my parents would come back because it was just after dinner was ready and exactly before the seven-thirty Dicney Channel Original Movies began; and when that was over it was time for bed. It felt like my whole school life was a routine and it revolved around television.
When I reached high school, my routine mainly stayed the same but with less television and more after-school activities and family responsibilities as I was the eldest daughter in my family. I don't really remember exactly when the fat heavy brain rotting box that could kill you if it fell on you turned into a flat screen, but I do remember when I started having my first high school crush on a boy who looked like a fish who was obsessed with Coldplay and then worrying about why I stopped having any further crushes even though the boys in my school were disgusting to me. I remember worrying every day that I wasn't as thin as all of my friends or as interesting as any of the girls that I talked to. I definitely remember struggling with Math and having a weekly breakdown about not understanding it because I was a Math whizkid throughout my primary years and I hated disappointing my high school Math teachers who were so sweet and patient with me. I am pretty sure out of the subjects, I had more tutors and tuition for Math than any other subject. Scratch that. That was the only class I had a tutor for.
However, like any other teenager, my worries centred heavily on what was next. What do I want to do after high school? How do you choose which path to go when it will determine how the next 30 years of your life are going to go? How do you apply for colleges? Do I make my hobby into my career? Should I make my hobby into my career? Can I even make my hobby into my career? Why was everyone planning after-graduation vacations? Am I the only one unsure of my future? Why are we being asked this at 15?
Then in my senior year, my grandmother passed away and my parents got a divorce. For some reason, that was the catalyst that made me choose what I wanted to do with life. Grandma chose to accept her fate and Mom and Dad chose to end their relationship. Automatically, I had to make a big life-changing decision too, so I told myself I wanted to be a writer. Now where do I go? With my head held high, I applied to the nearest college with my SPM trial results and when they told me I could start right after I graduated, I felt like I had my life on track. I was ready to enter a new phase in my life. No more uniforms. No more demerits because my curly hair stuck out in random places. No more seven a.m. classes.
Like any high school student with limited knowledge about the “uni life”, I was expecting eccentric lecturers, tons of field trips, and a future migration to a foreign country. I wasn't prepared for the culture shock I was about to experience, which was that there was no culture shock at all. My first week of college felt like the 100th week of high school. I was just in a bigger and fancier building with a whole bunch of new people, even a few recognizable. Which should have been disappointing but it somehow felt comforting because it meant that I had done this dance before and at least this time I could dress better. The only adjustments I had to make were regarding the timeframe and deadline of the assignments I was given and the nature of having lectures and tutorials as opposed to just coming to class and copying the board or reading out loud in front of the class. There is so much untapped knowledge.
Just like in high school though, I remember falling for a boy in my class who was also obsessed with Coldplay but instead looked like Harry Potter, still worrying about how I was not as thin as my friends and not as interesting as all these new girls and guys that I meet, having weekly breakdowns because I am struggling with some subjects and I do not want to disappoint my lecturers, but at least now I dare to challenge these doubts and I believe that college and university taught me that.
As a final-year degree student, I am definitely still wondering what I am going to do when I graduate, but this time I am open to whatever comes my way.
Sophia Azreen is a content creator under the Newswav Creator programme, where you get to express yourself, be a citizen journalist, and at the same time monetize your content & reach millions of users on Newswav. Log in to creator.newswav.com and become a Newswav Creator now!
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