Parents should actively support young children’s emotions when they watch the World Cup because they are often faced with joy, disappointment, anger, pride and excitement all at once or in quick succession, say digital media experts.
Younger children in particular still need to learn how to deal with their feelings especially negative ones. That’s why it’s important for parents to actively support their children in managing these emotions, say parenting counsellors.
What really helps in such situations and what should parents do if they are angry or sad themsleves?
All feelings are allowed: name them, do not judge them
Putting emotions into perspective is often still difficult for younger children. Monika Sklorz-Weiner of the Professional Association of German Psychologists says: "Especially for younger children, it can help to name feelings clearly without judging them."
Parents might say: "I can see you are disappointed and sad that the team lost the World Cup match. But in football, and in many other games too, someone always wins and someone loses. If you lose one match, you might win the next."
In general, children should learn that all feelings, positive and negative, are welcome. "So instead of distracting them with an ice cream, it is more helpful to comfort them with closeness," advises Sklorz-Weiner.
That way, parents can send a clear message: "You are OK with all your feelings."
Lead by example when emotions run high
The behaviour of adults also plays an important role especially for younger children. Experts refer to this as co-regulation: The calmer adults react themselves the easier it is for children to regulate their own feelings, Sklorz-Weiner says.
If a parent cannot stay calm because their own anger or sadness after a defeat feels overwhelming, it may be better for someone else to step in and do the comforting.
And if both parents are passionate World Cup fans and are emotionally invested, or if the child will only accept comfort from one person, it can be a chance to model coping strategies.
Parents could say: "When you are really angry, it helps to take a deep breath, step away for a moment and walk around for a bit."
What matters most is that children continue to feel safe. Even if they are upset themselves, adults should watch their words and gestures and support the child in dealing with their feelings, not the other way around.
Sklorz-Weiner suggests a simple offer: "If you are sad, would you like a hug? That might help you feel a little less sad."
