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By Mihar Dias September 2025
Here’s a story of Merdeka in Melaka that'll make you blush.
While the rest of us were trying to catch a glimpse of fireworks and hum along to Tanggal 31 by Sudirman, JAIM was out on its own patriotic mission — kicking down Melaka hotel doors in the name of morality. https://newswav.com/A2509_tifIwt?s=A_ktU959u&language=en
Nothing screams independence like making sure nobody gets too independent in their choice of sleeping arrangements. Or in a free country you still do not have the freedom to choose whom you sleep with at any age.
A 65-year-old man and a 49-year-old single mother were caught sleeping together. Clearly the greatest threat to the nation’s moral fibre since independence 68 years ago.
Forget corruption, forget inflation, forget the ever-shrinking ringgit — no, the real danger to Malaysia is Uncle 65 and Aunty 49, too exhausted from Merdeka celebrations to drive home. https://newswav.com/A2509_tifIwt?s=A_ktU959u&language=en
You’d think they were plotting a coup d’état instead of fighting fatigue and stiff knees.
The excuse for all this? Preventing out-of-wedlock pregnancies. “JAIM will continue such operations as a measure to curb social vices and immoral behaviour, including the increasingly worrying issue of out-of-wedlock pregnancies,” https://newswav.com/A2509_tifIwt?s=A_ktU959u&language=en
Right. Because if anyone’s going to suddenly fill our nurseries with illegitimate babies, it must be senior citizens sneaking into a hotel room after fireworks.
Perhaps JAIM should start raiding pharmacies for arthritis cream and hypertension pills, just to be safe.
But don’t worry — operations like these will continue. After all, it’s easier to catch tired couples than to catch corrupt politicians. Easier to raid hotel rooms than potholes. Easier to parade “immoral” middle-aged aunties than explain why the young are migrating in droves.
So, while the rest of us wave the flag, Melaka ensures Merdeka is always followed by a good old-fashioned khalwat bust. Sixty-eight years of independence — and we’re still policing who snores next to whom.
Mihar Dias (mihardias@gmail.com) is a content creator under the Newswav Creator programme, where you get to express yourself, be a citizen journalist, and at the same time monetize your content & reach millions of users on Newswav. Log in to creator.newswav.com and become a Newswav Creator now!
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